What escapes are for ?!

Heba. Contemplating from Gaza. 24/07/07. I kept looking at the blank page thinking and thinking about something to write about. Every now and then I go through this infertile impotent stage in which I can‘t think of anything and this blank page is really defying and frustrating me.

Should I write about taking driving lessons? That would be the funnies thing of all as my motor skills have always been poor and this task; learning how to drive, was postponed by me for ever till my work began to get affected. Should I write about how my temper with the kids is getting bad as I yell at them for no significant reasons; insignificant reasons in this case would include my two-year- old shampooing her hair after I just gave her a bath and put her in dry clothes and would include stuffing puppets in the dryer machine and washing machine and of course coloring the carpet with my lipstick!! And the list goes on and on. I feel inclined sometimes to write about the movie Fight Club and how it affects my mood in such a difficult- to- describe manner every time I watch it. It always makes me feel overwhelmed and emotionally estranged as project mayhem has been part of our surrounding for a certain period of time. I can write about my work colleague and friend who is waiting for Rafah Crossing to open to go to UAE to get married. As she has been engaged for a long period of time and of course had everything planned for the wedding (from the dress to the guests list) and as Gazan planning always falls short, her planning is gone with the wind-sort of!. I can also write about me reading Pride and Prejudice for the 10th time and falling in love with Elizabeth strength and uniqueness of character all over again, contradicting and opposing the image of a university colleague (a masters student) who said to the professor just yesterday with clear conviction “a woman is a woman and a man is a man- why to fuss about it?”. He nodded with silent consent or he was simply not paying attention.

I think all these topics are good escapes from writing about what matters now but what escapes are for? They are always good for adaptation, conformation, and assimilation purposes!

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